Unwanted Change

Facebook did it again. It just blew my mind with an update that made me feel pangs of love and excitement and extreme sadness all at once. I just found out that a friend of mine, an old roommate and close girlfriend during my grad school years, had a beautiful baby girl. How wonderful! Congratulations! But, the tears well in my eyes because I didn’t even know she was pregnant. Tim and I saw this friend and her husband just a little over a year ago. We stayed with them one night when we were in Boston. He cooked a wonderful salmon; we went to a trendy Harvard Square bar and tried new beers; we talked late into the night. Tim and I marveled at how easy the conversation came, at how much we liked them and felt as if no time had passed although it had been a couple of years since we’d seen them. Since that time there have been a couple of email exchanges. I emailed to tell her I was pregnant. We sent them a birth announcement when Adelaide was born. I don’t blame my friends for not notifying me of their news. I have to admit I haven’t been the best about keeping in touch. Still, it breaks my heart to know that I missed out on this life altering event that has taken up so much of their emotional energy this year. If I had known, we could have used each other as pregnancy confidants. I’m sure we’ll see them again – our girls will play together and once again the conversation will come so easily that it will feel as if no time has passed. It just makes me sad to be reminded that people grow apart, that friendships change and sometimes, Facebook is an annoying reminder of this.

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